Things sought

When I initially set up this blog, I harnessed it with code from Statcounter so that I could keep track of how many visitors stopped by and read my posts. It's pretty great to be able to see page loads, what's popular, that sort of thing.

And one of the coolest things this application allows for me to do is see how someone came across my blog. Sometimes this is from other blogs. Sometimes people are emailed things I've posted (why, I have no idea). But, more often than not, people stumble across my writing from regular old search engine results. Most of the time these are fairly logical. Searches for "Max Burger," for example, brought people to my little post about the new eatery that went up last week. "Slap Chop" searches brought tons of traffic to my rants about Vince Offer and his products-of-the-week (that is, when he isn't busy biting prostitutes in hotel rooms).

But sometimes people arrive at the blog looking for some strange things. I'm sure visitors are always disappointed when their queries for "castle interiors" bring them to my post on my visit to Gillette Castle. And I'm very sure that whoever did a search for "pussy for sale, hartford" (sorry to be crass, but that's what they searched for) wasn't interested in watching the clip from Tim and Eric Awesome Show! that I posted concerning their bit about painting cats (with the juvenile title "Pussy Doodles"). 

And then there are the celebrities that search for themselves (or have Google robots do the searching for them). When I first posted about Criss Angel's former life as hair metal band frontman, I received quite a few hits from the Las Vegas area, as well as Playboy Enterprises (at the time, Mr. Angel was romantically involved with one of the "Girls Next Door"). When I compared 30 Rock actor (who absolutely is amazing in American Splendor) Judah Friedlander to a perp from the TV show Street Patrol, I got a hit directly from Friedlander's personal website. But the best hit came back in September of last year, when someone from Obama For America visited the blog after doing a Google search for "Cindy McCain Cryptkeeper."   

On April Fools

I saw a news article today about President Obama giving an iPod to Queen Elizabeth. I laughed. Then I realized it was a real story and not an April Fools' Day joke.

A similar thing happened this morning when I read an article concerning John McCain's sudden interest in seeking a pardon for former heavyweight champ Jack Johnson. I didn't laugh at the cause. The fact that Johnson had been racially attacked back in 1913 because of an interracial relationship is just another horrible tale our country has in its history. Rather, I assumed this was a joke because, well, John McCain doesn't seem much like the supporter of such a cause. Remember, this is the same man who opposed MLK day in 1983 (he later reversed his stance - wasn't going over well with voters, I suspect).

And there was also this quote from McCain: "I think the last person I have to convince probably is President Obama."

Don't worry, Mr. McCain, I doubt he'll need much convincing.

I guess my point here is that, on days when we're looking for the punch line, it's sometimes difficult to determine what's legitimate news and what isn't. And this leads one to question what makes some news legitimate to begin with? Do we need a report on Obama/Queen gifts? Do stories like this, which were once known as "fluff," now qualify as ACTUAL news?

I can't wait for tomorrow. At least when I laugh at some of the ridiculous items I see in print, I'll know I'm just being cynical.

Is it bad when it feels like jury duty?

Yesterday, I took my first trip to the state capitol. I attended a public hearing at the Legislative Office Building where, among other topics, a proposed cap on Connecticut's motion picture tax credit system was being discussed.

I know, I know, slow down, Ben, this is WAY to exciting for me to read.

I was sitting in on the hearing for a short article I'm writing, though, in secret, I was also there to support the current tax credit system. I understand the state's fear of an uncapped system, but I don't think a cap as small as the governor is proposing ($30 million/year) will do any good for the infancy of the motion picture industry in the state. There are $114 million in currently unused pledged credits already distributed. Such a cap would essentially be pulling the rug from under these people.

I won't get too deep into this. I realize it gets boring. I will just say that most other states with similar programs are making between $1.50 and $1.90 for every dollar the state pledges in tax credits. 

Anyway . . .

I arrived at the capital at around 10:15 and was lucky enough to find a visitor's parking space (the last in the lot!). I made my way underground from the main Capitol to the LOB and took a seat in the room reserved for the hearing. I had my pad and digital voice recorder ready.

And then I realized I was going to be sitting for a very, very long time.

I can only equate the experience as wasting away a day at jury duty. The seats were uncomfortable. People were there out of obligation. Folks were nodding off in the corners.

But this was more like jury duty if everyone in the room decided they had something to say and were all deaf to the fact that what they have to say was exactly the same as the person who spoke right before them. Yes, I realize this was a public hearing and the fact that these exist shows how wonderful our democracy is in this country. But when 3/4 of the state representatives and senators leave as the meeting begins, does it matter that 100 people want their time to talk?

The meeting lasted 7 hours!

I ended up leaving at about the 3 1/2 hour mark. My butt had fallen asleep and I had gotten enough of the "experience" to write my piece. I made my way home. 

Turns out the entire event was being broadcast live on the Connecticut News station. I could have gotten everything I needed and never stepped out my front door. I could have worn pajamas all day!

Oh well. I suppose the television broadcast wouldn't have given me the scope of the hundreds that showed up in support of the tax credit. Nor would it have made me weary of ever attending such a hearing again without a good book to keep me company.

Happy Presidents' Day, especially you, Mr. Lincoln

C-SPAN, riding the hot, hip bandwagon that is Presidents' Day (a holiday that all the cool kids in television's coveted 18 to 34-year-old demographic are digging), today released the results of their "2009 Historian Presidential Leadership Survey." Never heard of it? Neither had I. Then again, I couldn't tell you what station C-SPAN is on my cable, either. 

Regardless, the results of the survey, in which a group of important American historians ranked the nation's 42 completed administrations on 10 different topics, were unleashed like a screaming banshee, exactly as you'd expect from a wild child like C-SPAN (if you don't get it, I'm trying to imply that C-SPAN is dull and does little to make itself, and politics in general, interesting to young people . . . I know, I'm clever). Not shockingly, Mr. Abraham Lincoln was the belle of the ball, scoring the highest point total overall. In a shocking twist, however, George Washington usurped second place from previous number two, FDR. Snap!

Oh, and our most recent failure, George W.? He came in at number 36 overall. Though he scored in the middle of the pack when it came to topics like "Vision" and "Crisis Leadership," he was second to last when it came to "International Relations." William Henry Harrision and his 32 days in office took last place in that category. Man, how pathetic must you feel when the only person you beat in a category never even held office long enough to ATTEMPT to create such relationships?

You can read the entire list over here at C-SPAN's website.   

A great day

Bye bye! Don't worry about writing! We won't miss you!

Congratulations North Dakota, you corrupt son of a bitch!

USA Today, well, today, released an article about state corruption in the wake of the recent Illinois scandal involving Governor Blagojevich's attempt to sell President-elect Obama's vacant Senate seat (times are tough, right? I mean, who wants a hungry Blagojevich child coughing at their doorstep this Christmas because they don't have enough millions for food?). 

Turns out, North Dakota is the most corrupt state in the nation, with an average of 8.3 public corruption convictions for every 100,000 residents between the years 1998 and 2007. My fair state of Connecticut, milquetoast as it is, had a piddly 3.2 convictions per 100,000 in the same time period. Always the bridesmaid . . .

Extra, extra, read all about it over here.  

Town-by-town results

The day-after postmortem. I love the day-after postmortem. Regardless of overall results, I like to see how each town voted. Who each town elected. What questions passed.

Thankfully, websites like courant.com make this easy, with town-by-town listings available for the entire state. In West Hartford, for example, the tally for president (as of 8:51 a.m.) was 19,976 votes for President-elect Obama, 8,666 "number-of-the-beast" votes for McCain, and 341 "I'm his cousin" votes for Nader. You can see all of Connecticut over here. You can also find Massachusetts in a cool interactive map over here. CNN is hosting a country-wide results map over here.

* * * * *

In local political news, West Hartford's own rock-n-roll Republican Joe Visconti (singer-songwriter/actor/Emmy winner (really ?)/contractor) failed to unseat incumbent John Larson last night. In fact, the man got pummeled, losing at a 2-to-1 margin. Thank goodness he has his music career to fall back on. Before long, I'm sure we'll be seeing him tearing it up at the Wolf Den at Mohegan Sun.

Finally . . . our country has gotten it right.

Woo hoo!

Election day: this time, it's personal

Just returned from my local polling station, located at the corner of Farmington and South Highland. Couldn't have been easier. Very efficient. I arrived at 9:15 and was in a voting booth by 9:20. I would estimate that there was 25 or so people inside voting at any given moment when I was there.

It still being early, everyone working the polls was in a great mood. Smiles all around.

My advice? If you can sneak out this morning to vote, you'll probably have a better experience.

Election day freebies

Tomorrow, I hope I don't need to remind anyone, is election day. And, after the grueling struggle that is voting, doesn't everyone want a little something to congratulate them on a job well done?

My fellow Americans, are we in luck.

All day Tuesday, Starbucks will be giving away free tall coffees to every customer who comes in and tells them that they voted.

And, tomorrow from 5 p.m. to 8 p.m., Ben and Jerry's will be giving free scoops of ice cream to all who enter.

Free coffee. Free ice cream. Free coffee ice cream? Perhaps.

So, go vote. Then get some free stuff.

A timely message from "Drunk History"

Drunk History is a really entertaining web series hosted over at Funny or Die in which random individuals drink a lot of booze and then tell historical stories. These stories are then acted out visually in the exact manner of which they are told. As you would expect, the results are often hilarious.

The most recent episode of DH tells the tale of William Henry Harrison, the ninth president of the United States, and questions if an older man should be left in charge of a country. It isn't the best episode in the series (I'd have to give that to the Jack Black/Benjamin Franklin episode), but it delivers a timely message for us all to ponder as we approach the big election next week.

See more funny videos at Funny or Die

Reading into the lyrics: Joe Visconti's "America"

I don't know if I have to say this again, but I'm new here. So, from my total outsider perspective, Joe Visconti, West Hartford Town Council member and current Republican candidate for the First Congressional District of Connecticut, comes across as a total character. I mean, how many candidates for Congress have their own CD?

Wait, did anyone out there not know this?

Yes, over at josephvisconti.com, you can not only look at some pretty boss photos of Mr. Visconti in his "artist" pose, but you can purchase his brand new album. You can also watch the video for his single "America."

I'm watching it right now. There's the American flag, flapping proudly in the air. Black and white photos are beginning to fade in and out, showing the history of our great nation. And, here comes Mr. Visconti's voice. "America," he starts. "The pipes are calling."

Hey, hold up a minute! These lyrics seem VERY familiar. I think I've heard these words before. In fact, I'm positive I've heard these words before.

Time for a little internet digging . . .

Okay, here we go.

The following is the first verse and chorus of Joe Visconti's "America." After each line, I have included songs and musicians who use the exact same lyrics as Joe in their own, well published and often-times very popular songs:

America (Neil Diamond, Simon and Garfunkel, Bernstein/Sondheim)
The pipes are calling (Danny Boy)
From the rock of ages (Def Leppard, Grant Lee Buffalo, "Rock of Ages" traditional hymn, and countless others)
America
Can you see the dawn's
Early light? ("Star-Spangled Banner")
You were there (Amy Grant, Babyface, Michael Jackson)
You were there
When my eyes had seen the glory ("Battle Hymn of the Republic")
As I walked
Through the valley of the shadow of death (well, besides Psalm 23:4, Nas, Kanye West, Coolio, Megadeth, and just about a million others)
Liberty belongs
To everyone
Freedom is a song (Sinead O’Connor)
That must be sung (Peter, Paul & Mary)
Love is all we need (a little outfit called The Beatles, but, you've probably never heard of them. They're British.)
To understand
That brotherhood and peace (Mac Davis)
Are right at hand

There are a lot of similar lyrics in this song, aren't there? Someone is guilty of sloppy song writing, if you ask me.

Now, I'm not saying that Mr. Visconti cribs all of his notes from the big boys out there in the music world, but can anyone in this day and age get away with singing "love is all we need" and NOT carry the last name McCartney or Starr? Oh, but in The Beatles' song, the lyric is "love is all YOU need." This could be another Vanilla Ice/Queen dispute over originality (in their case, it was over the rhythm to "Ice Ice Baby" sounding awfully familiar to "Under Pressure"). But, something tells me the Fab Two are too busy to care. 

Something also tells me that Mr. Visconti has very little chance in winning the popular vote eight days from now. It's a shame, really, because I'm sure he'd come up with a pretty interesting acceptance speech. Maybe something along these lines . . .

I haven't had an orthodox career, and I've wanted more than anything to have your respect. The first time I didn't feel it, but this time I feel it, and I can't deny the fact that you like me, right now, you like me! Reverend clergy, fellow citizens, we observe today not a victory of party, but a celebration of freedom - symbolizing an end, as well as a beginning - signifying renewal, as well as change. O God, our gracious Heavenly Father, help us to see the insights that come from this new nation. Help us to follow Thee and all of Thy creative works in this world, and that somehow we will discover that we are made to live together as brothers And that it will come in this generation: the day when all men will recognize the fatherhood of God and the brotherhood of man. I am the king of the world! 

In case you were wondering, that speech is a combination of the following: Sally Field's academy award speech from 1985, JFK's inaugural speech from 1961, Martin Luther King's "Birth of a New Nation" speech from 1957, and James Cameron'c academy award speech from 1998.

Of course, I'm just having a little bit of fun here. Regardless of his talent as a musician, I'm sure Mr. Visconti is a viable candidate. I may not be a Republican, but I can't fault anyone for taking on the enormous task and responsibility associated with a run at a major office. Plus, our nation may have a first-term governor/hockey mom from Alaska as our 2nd in command, so why can't Joe be a Congressman? 

I wish Mr. Visconti, as well as all of the candidates, the best of luck in the election.

But, man, a rockin' and rollin' Congressman would certainly help kick the uptight image of Connecticut, wouldn't it?

"New Left Note" by Saul Levine

The film Chicago 10, which chronicles the trial of the Chicago Seven, was on PBS last night. As I watched part of it, I was reminded of my old college professor Saul Levine and his stories of the New Left and his anti-war protests of the late 1960s. He made an epic avant-garde film that recorded many of these moments, titled New Left Note. It is a project that took him something like 12 years to complete. 

I've always had a deep respect for NLN and thought that it truly captured an emotion and genuine energy that modern Hollywood films set in the time period never seem to achieve. Levine's rapid-fire edits of his super 8 footage create an immediacy to the subject matter and manipulate the audience into an almost frightened frenzy as images splash over their eyes. Of course, this frenzy is also seen on the faces of the young people in each image, so the manipulation certainly does the trick.

But, it isn't a film for everyone, I'll give it that. When it comes down to brass tacks, we are still talking about a 9+ minute, silent, super 8 film. That being said, I don't know of another film I've seen that has given me a sense of the time quite like New Left Note.

Saul has recently posted NLN and some of his other films on his own YouTube channel. If you're interested in watching New Left Note, I have embedded it below.

My favorite recent Reuters photo

What's that phrase? Oh yeah. A picture says a thousand words.

The children of America have picked the President!

I remember, as a little pre-trailing spouse version of myself, having a class vote for the 1984 Presidential election. I voted for Reagan, just like most of the adults in America did that year. It had nothing to do with the state of the country or my parents' political tastes. No, my excuse was that I had no idea who Mondale was. That, and I was only a 6-year-old at the time and Reagan's face was everywhere.

My incident of child politics was nothing but a exercise my elementary school did for entertainment. I believe Reagan ended up winning in a landslide.

Oddly, I don't remember doing another mock election in that school.

However, I'm sure many schools around the country will be holding youth elections in upcoming weeks. And, many of the adult teachers will probably grimace when their favorite little tyke votes against their favorite candidate. But, they'll just let it go and move on, knowing that the election was nothing more than a silly game the class played together.

Scholastic, on the other hand, takes the job of the "child vote" very seriously. They poll children all over the country for their mock elections, and this year received over 250,000 responses.

Polls closed on October 10th. Paper and electronic ballots were counted.

And the winner, with 57% of the vote, was . . .

Barack Obama!

John McCain received 39% of the votes cast by the youths. 

That other 4%? Those votes went to a range of people, from Stephen Colbert to Miley Cyrus.

I'm interested to see if this election reflects how us adults will be voting three weeks from today. I have to assume children are directly influenced by their parents, though, like my 1984 vote for Reagan, sometimes the more popular face wins out with young minds.

But, more than anything, I'd really like to see the voting records for the parents of the kids who voted for Stephen Colbert.

Visit scholastic.com to read all about their election coverage.

Friday night tangents . . .

Sitting and watching the presidential debate, a drinking game seems ripe for the creation. How about, every time someone says "fundamental" a drink is taken. Every time McCain calls himself the anti- "Miss Congeniality," another drink is taken. For every smirk, take a drink. Every time the moderator (in tonight's case, Jim Lehrer) reminds the candidates to address each other, take a drink. Better yet, scrap this idea. You'd be drunk before the end of the first 9 minute segment.

Today was the first day of rain in at least a week and a half or longer, and yet I already wish it would end. Why does that happen?

Can Rolling Stone still be considered a viable source for music criticism? I'm pretty sure they've started taking CDs and are just tossing them up the stairs to decide on star ratings. Highest stair gets 5 stars. Lowest gets 1. That's the only way I can understand how the new Jessica Simpson disk (hey, I couldn't do pop, so let's try country!) scored the same number of stars as Okkervil River (don't know them? Google the song "A Girl In Port." Absolutely killer). Or, how Miley Cyrus and the Jonas Brothers scored equal or better recent reviews than Lou Reed, Fela Kuti, and Elton John. Why is Rolling Stone reviewing these fad albums? Is the new age demographic for the magazine girls 10 - 14? Wait, does Disney own them now, along with everything else? Instead of classic journalism like Hunter Thompson's Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas gracing the pages of RS, should we now expect a continuing series written by a Jonas telling us about a bender on Space Mountain? Time will tell . . .

Actually, now that I'm sitting in the other room, all I can hear from the debate is the slight whistle every time John McCain speaks. He sounds like an old prospector. Maybe he's telling us about gold! Aw, if he is, Obama doesn't seem interested. Guess I should go back in and pay closer attention. You know, just in case McCain IS talking about where we can find gold. 

Until later, I'm signing off.   

Free Wilco music!

Jeff Tweedy and Wilco, starting today, are offering their take on the Bob Dylan classic "I Shall Be Released" as a free download on their website. The cover, recorded on August 23rd in Bend, Oregon, is a collaboration between the gents and the group Fleet Foxes. It can be found here.

The exchange for the free download is a simple promise to vote on November 4th. Pretty easy, eh? Agree to vote and have the track emailed to you. If you haven't yet registered to vote (tsk, tsk), the site provides links to do so, as well.

So, start downloading! And, keep your promise to vote!

Our superficial political wants, tracked by Google!

Every presidential election, like a stomachache after eating too much ice cream, we get bombarded with stupid polls, like the infamous "Who'd you rather have a beer with . . ." brainteaser during the Bush/Kerry race in 2004. The most recent example of this nonsense has been the "Who would you rather have take care of your children . . ." poll between candidates John McCain and Barack Obama. Obama won, most likely because folks were afraid their kids would get too hopped up on hard candy if they were left alone with Ol' Grampy John for an afternoon. I mean, we've all seen the Simpsons episode when Grampa babysits Bart and Lisa:

Bart: Grampa, Mom was in such a hurry, she forgot to give you this.
It's a list of the things Lisa and I can and can't do.

Grampa: [reads] Eh heh. Uh huh. You're allowed to smoke cigars?

These sort of mindless polls made me wonder about our superficial political desires, from candidate's looks to clothes. Honestly, I can't tell you how many people have stumbled upon my Cindy McCain/Crypt Keeper comparison since I posted it. It seems, regardless of our political desires, we always want to find out really useless info on our potential leaders.

So, I headed over to Google Trends to do a little test. Google Trends essentially tracks the popularity of web searches over a range of time and projects them into a volumed index. I kept my searches simple. I only wanted to know info from the past month, and only in the United States. I started with straight trend searches for both the names "Barack Obama" and "John McCain." Here are Obama's trend numbers:

And, here are McCain's:

Both seem to have spiked around the same time and have tapered off in the past week and a half.

Now, I wanted to know what kind of physical attributes each candidate had that struck Americans. Surprisingly, most of my combinations of phrases did not bring up results (well, not completely surprisingly, as McCain pretty much has nothing eye catching about his appearance). The only thing that I got a hit from was a search for "Obama Shirt." Here are the results:

 

For whatever reason, Mr. Obama's standard white shirt is consistently getting higher trend searches than the candidate himself. Granted, the Y-axis of each Google Trend search represents only the volume of searches on average and not a "real" number, but this may be a sign for the McCain camp to start putting their candidate in some sharp outfits over the next two months. Maybe that'll be the next challenge on Project Runway! I can just see the uncomfortable runway show now . . .

Moving onto the candidates for vice president, I skipped the straight trend search and only searched for physical attribute trends. So, for each candidate, Sarah Palin and Joe Biden, I ran the same phrases: hair, face, glasses (for Sarah Palin), clothes, suit, shirt, shoes, and tie (for Joe Biden). Not surprisingly, the biggest hit I got was for Sarah Palin's glasses:

What are all the hip art chicks going to do now that their frames have been snatched by soccer moms across the country? Seriously, this could be problematic.

The only trend result I got for Senator Biden was when I searched for his hair. I doubt these searches were attempts by anyone to compliment his style, but rather to make light of his follicle foibles:

Biden, like McCain, apparently just doesn't have any physical attributes that people want to search for.

Finally, I decided to do a search for each presidential and vice presidential candidate and the word "underwear." This being America, I expected the worst. But, I was happy to find no trend searches for any of the candidates. However, when I changed my search terms to swimwear, things changed. Of the 4, only Palin came up in a trend. Honestly, I thought more folks would want to see Biden or McCain in a speedo, but what do I know?

Here's the search results for "Palin Bikini:"

So, what does all this mean? Perhaps it shows that we're all a little superficial in our political choices. It also means that women are far more mature in their web searches than men, at least when it comes to wanting to see a candidate in little clothing. Also, if you're Tina Fey or Lisa Loeb, you'd better stock up on spare frames before Lens Crafters gets backordered. And, I'd sink some money into the Oxford shirt industry. It may be the solution to our shaky economy.

But, what I think it really means is: Obama Shirt vs. Palin Glasses. Two items enter the caged ring, only one leaves! Someone get on making that viral video!